next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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