there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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