And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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