What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
