its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
