i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
