I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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