So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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