whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Sorry about my life...
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
