so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
