I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
