Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
PANTIES FOUND
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize