you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
