you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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