the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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