So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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