I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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