Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
