let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
