You're completely useless in the revolution.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Randomize
