I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
