Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
