My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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