No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
