dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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