is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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