I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
