he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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