"it" just moved
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
