new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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