She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
