You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
