hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize