My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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