Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
