thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
