its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Just invented taco cereal.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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