wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
