Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Bring me that man meat
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
