wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
