stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
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