I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
