hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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