I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize