I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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