just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Randomize
