he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
