smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
