Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
