You just made me feel so damn special
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
