Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
