apparently the secret to your success is patron
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
